This web site is about what happened to me at UCONN. In this section I will attempt to answer questions regarding my past involvement in a student protest at Wesleyan University. Some printed articles written about the Wesleyan incident mix facts with speculation with regards to my involvement. Some of the gaps are due in part to the fact I have never spoken to the press about it with the hopes of just putting it all behind me. Obviously it has come back up. For those who have questions let me set the record straight about a few things.

The protest I was involved in at Wesleyan involved two individuals besides myself: Nicholas Haddad, another as of right now unnamed individual who is now attending urban design school in Boston (both of whom when looking back had the odd trait in common of either looking or behaving or both much older than college sophomore's but having the ability to pass at the same time much like students 1 and 2 as discussed on the law enforcemt page not of this web site). Nicholas Haddad actually planned most of it and ran it by the other person charged and myself. The other person was selected to throw the actual incendiary devices because he was the most athletic and believed he could jump the four foot fence the easiest.

He knew the specific area best. Apparently some of the journalists who wrote some of those articles had other things to do that were more pressing than research as this is all part of the record. After the incident the other person charged and my self each decided Nicholas was too extreme, too dangerous and that we were more interested in non violent forms of protest. 

He constantly lied and made up stories upon stories.  An example can be seen in this photo wher he is like all the other students supposed to be on a hunger strike and his demeanor would portray suffering and deep feeling.  He laughed about this photo as he was not on a hunger strike and claimed all those who really were, which was most of them, were "fools." All this while claiming to be against the establishment and spending curious amounts of time at Middletown Police station voluntarily. 

The other student involved claimed to have stepped it down to just nonviolent protest and organizing with student groups at Trinity College in Hartford, Ct. and Brown University.  Trinity College also had violent protests that year.At this point the other person charged was able to get away from Nicholas. I had another problem.

Nicholas had previously managed to acquire some guns, and I let him store them at my house. I was scared and didn't want to tell him to remove them immediately. I asked him to move them as soon as he could and he said he would. This went on for a while. Finally I called him and told him he had to remove his things from my house. He said he would in a week and asked if he could come over to look at them. When he arrived and got his machine gun he loaded it with a double clip, cocked it and pointed it at me. He told me he was in a difficult position because I knew he had guns and could link him to any future crimes. He told me I could stay out of his plans for now but when he needed me I had to be there or he would kill me. He then said he would take one gun and leave the other at my house.

I should have gone to the police, but was afraid I would have to give myself up for my involvement in the protest. I was in over my head but had no idea how deep.

The semester went on and more incidents took place, but I had nothing to do with those. He would come over to my house periodically and talk in an effort to discuss in his ideas, but I would always find a way to say I wasn't interested or that people suspected me and it would put him in danger if he did anything with me. He asked me to introduce him to my cousin who I had previously told him occasionally sold marijuana. Nicholas was looking for a way to get a lot of money and thought he could supply my cousin with money to sell drugs. My cousin said he wanted to meet him too.

I hoped when the school year was over he'd go home and I would be free of him. However, at the end of the semester he came to me and told me he flunked out of Wesleyan University and would need me to help him. He reminded me of his threat and I knew what he meant. He said he wanted to come with me to the University of New Haven where I had been accepted and was planning to just go on with my life in music. He told me he had been selling drugs with my cousin and he could afford an apartment in New Haven. He wanted me to live with him until he got established. I was getting worried.

He was becoming less interested in his revolutionary aims, but he still talked about it. Of course he wasn't doing anything just talking. But he was selling drugs and talking about the easy money and all the things he could buy with the money. He talked about women and cars, and revolution was no longer high on his list. He always maintained that his family were terrorists and if anything happened to him they would kill everyone he told them about. He said this was his insurance like someone saying my family is in the mafia so keep your mouth shut.

It sounds too wild to fathom, but I wasn't the only one who believed his tales. He spun them all over the Wesleyan campus and most people he talked to believed him. His drug dealings with my cousin were going on and the first school semester had not yet started. He mentioned a big sale where he was giving my cousin money to sell a large amount of cocaine. They were to split the profits. A previous drug deal had apparently gone wrong, so one day Nicholas showed up unannounced at my cousin's apartment where he lived with his mother.

My cousin wasn't there and when he later asked Nicholas about this he reminded him he knew where he lived and if anything happened on this drug deal he'd kill my cousin's mother and sister. Well, my cousin's partner who was to help him sell the drugs was robbed of all the money Nicholas had given to them. My cousin called Nicholas and said he had the first delivery of money to split with him and to meet him. When Nicholas showed up he was shot and killed by my cousin in order to protect his mother and sister.

My cousin called me that night and told me Nicholas had not shown up for their meeting. He said he was worried that something had happened to Nicholas. I was petrified and told my cousin I was going to have to run because Nicholas' family would kill me. He decided to run too claiming he feared the same thing. We had been on the run for a few days when we were apprehended by police who said I could return home. They caught my cousin's accomplice in the murder and he told them everything. I was still afraid and had the police call the local FBI office to try and seek witness protection from Nicholas' family.

If I was involved in the murder what reason would my cousin's accomplice have not to implicate me. He was not in the least bit scared of me and had no emotional ties to me. He might have secured himself a better deal. He did not implicate me. This is because I had nothing to do with Nicholas Haddad's murder. I had no previous knowledge and didn't find out the story till after my cousin was arrested. If I had known I most certainly would have tried to stop it, period.

I was not a terrorist as everything I did after the first protest incident was fueled by my fear of Nicholas and my percieved threat from his family. I was so scared that I sought witness protection. I was an eighteen year old C student at best and was not well read enough, intelligent enough or experienced enough to pull off a sham of that magnitude. As far as the firebombing was concerned the other person charged has recently sent me an email confirming my assertions that I did not throw any bombs and has always belived I was coerced by Nick Haddad. He also states he believed I was coerced by the government.

He was not alone in his beliefs as his defense was based on that premise during his trial. A jury viewed that argument as credible and found him not guilty. His beliefs evolved away from contact with me as we have had no contact until recently when he wrote me an email asking me to remove his name from my website in order that it did not come up when people googled his name. I said I would if he'd write a letter admitting I did not throw the bombs and his name would be removed except as an image. He has moved on with his life as I mentioned previously in this section and so although I have yet to recieve this letter from him I will leave his name and photo out of this section for now. If you wish to view the email he sent me you can click here.

As it turned out Nicholas Haddad was simply a liar. The FBI said there was no reason for witness protection as there was no merit to any claims of his family having been actual terrorists. They never interviewed me again about it then or after 9/11.

It's my belief young adults and juvenile offenders should have the opportunity to rehabilitate themselves and not be relegated to the fringes of s ociety. Society's underbelly can only offer the types of social circles and lifestyles afforded by the circumstances within those environments. The neccessary changes won't won't happen by themselves, but when a person has started change a civilized society should foster and encourage their positive growth.

They were youngsters and children when they commited their crime and no one is free from the sins of youth. It seems to me the only people who are the most insistent upon relegating young people to the outskirts of society end up being those who are reminded most glaringly of their own indiscretions when apprehending such people. The thought of their own past coming back to haunt them must be pretty scary given some of the reactions I've recieved in the roughly eighteen odd years since my period of teenage turmoil.

It would be an understatement to say I was a stupid kid. I'm a different person now shaped by the events of 1990. I'm stronger, more experienced and a little better educated. If I ran across a Nicholas Haddad character now I'd see him for who he was, but I guess that's what they mean when they say hindsight's 20/20.

In reading this it should become obvious to anyone that I am not beyond reproach. I don't claim to be an angel, but I did my crime and served my time. I do believe I have the right to go on with my life like any other American. I've worked hard to better myself step by step and make the most of every situation when I could. Everyone deserves the chance to better themselves within reason. That's my only wish and all I'm trying to say. Until I get my point across I'm going to keep saying it.